Today, the French renamed American Cheese to "Freedom Cheese"Awesome.
For those of you who don't understand this: Americans renamed “French fries” to “freedom fries” in response to France's refusal to join with us in our invasion of Iraq in 2003.
Monday, September 2, 2013
Today, the French renamed American Cheese to "Freedom Cheese"Awesome.
You are given £1 a week because the people who look after you think that's fair. And even if you think it is not fair, they have all the power and all the money, so there is little you can do about it.
You could scream and scream till they give in and give you more pocket money, but that is not a nice way to behave (although some so-called grown-ups, such as movie stars and bankers, have been known to do that). So you will have to acquire some power, and there are two ways to do that. There is capitalist individualism, which is for you to become brilliant at doing something people need, so that people pay you lots of money to do it. Or there is the syndicalist way, where all the six-year-olds gang up together and ask the grown-ups nicely to share their money with you (democratic socialism) or where you threaten to break the grown-ups' things unless they share their money with you (revolutionary socialism).
Sunday, September 1, 2013
Saturday, August 31, 2013
I see the Obama “reset” is going so swimmingly that the president is now threatening to go to war against a dictator who gassed his own people. Don’t worry, this isn’t anything like the dictator who gassed his own people that the discredited warmonger Bush spent 2002 and early 2003 staggering ever more punchily around the country inveighing against. The 2003 dictator who gassed his own people was the leader of the Baath Party of Iraq. The 2013 dictator who gassed his own people is the leader of the Baath Party of Syria. Whole other ball of wax. The administration’s ingenious plan is to lose this war in far less time than we usually take. In the unimprovable formulation of an unnamed official speaking to the Los Angeles Times, the White House is carefully calibrating a military action “just muscular enough not to get mocked.”Go read the whole thing.
Friday, August 30, 2013
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
At the Irish wedding reception the disc jockey yelled:
"All married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living!"
The bartender was almost crushed to death.
Monday, August 26, 2013
WHOREHOUSE SUES LOCAL CHURCH OVER LIGHTNING STRIKE!
Diamond D's brothel began construction on an expansion of their building to increase their ever-growing business. In response, the local Baptist Church started a campaign to block the business from expanding – with morning, afternoon, and evening prayer sessions at their church.
Work on Diamond D's progressed right up until the week before the grand reopening when lightning struck the whorehouse and burned it to the ground!
After the cat-house was burned to the ground by the lightning strike, the church folks were rather smug in their outlook, bragging about "the power of prayer."
But late last week 'Big Jugs' Jill Diamond, the owner/madam, sued the church, the preacher and the entire congregation on the grounds that the church ... "was ultimately responsible for the demise of her building and her business -- either through direct or indirect divine actions or means."
In its reply to the court, the church vehemently and voraciously denied any and all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.
The crusty old judge read through the plaintiff's complaint and the defendant's reply, and at the opening hearing he commented, "I don't know how the hell I'm going to decide this case, but it appears from the paperwork, that we now have a whorehouse owner who staunchly believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that thinks it's all bullshit."
This is how we lose our rights. Not overnight in one fell swoop, but gradually, after getting worn down again and again, and after hundreds of mini-panic-attacks, and with ever-ratcheting procedural changes that effectively invalidate the assurances and safeguards that we're given. I give up. The terrorists have won.