Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America:
Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as'HILLBILLIES.' You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.
And furthermore, in order to be politically correct regarding women:
- She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a 'BREASTED-AMERICAN. '
- She is not 'EASY' - She is 'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'
- She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a 'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'
- She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a 'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'
- She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes 'VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'
- She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a 'LOW COST PROVIDER.'And to be politically correct regarding men:
- He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a 'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'
- He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is 'OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'
- He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He 'INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'
- He is not 'BALDING' - He is in 'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'
- He does not act like a 'TOTAL A*S' - He develops a case of 'RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION’
- It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants – it's 'TROUSER CLEAVAGE.'
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Via my mom: