A Dog's Prayer...

Via my mom:

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.

4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.

5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt across the carpet.

11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

Baby Talk...

These twins have their own language!  Cute and funny.  Via Frankie T.:

2012 Is Going to be an Interesting Election Year!

Via about half the readers of this blog:

Things Confucious Didn't Say...

Via reader Dr. Simi L.:

Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient.

Lady who goes camping must beware of evil intent.

Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion.

Man who runs in front of car gets tired, man who runs behind car gets exhausted.

Man who eats many prunes get good run for money.

War does not determine who is right, it determines who is left.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it.

Man who drives like hell is bound to get there.

Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.

Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.

A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood!

Osborne I...

I owned one of these back in the early '80s, along with the (not pictured) optional Fresnel lens magnifier for the tiny little CRT.  I also wrote software for it – a little utility that automatically “tuned” the stepper motor head drive on the floppy disk drives. 

Ordinarily the stepper motors were driven at a constant step rate, controlled by a Western Digital floppy controller chip that was a nearly universal standard in computers of the day.  This constant step rate was the simplest approach, but it wasn't the only one possible.  My utility accelerated the head motion for the first half of its travel, and decelerated it for the second half.  The result was considerably improved head positioning performance.  On such a slow system, this was no small matter.  I had no trouble demonstrating significant performance improvement on such common tasks as starting up an application.

However, that performance improvement is not why most people bought my little application.  There was, briefly, a little buzz about my “FastTrak” utility – because it made the Osborne I much quieter.  This was an unintended, but happy, side-effect of the performance improvement.  It turns out that a smoothly-accelerating head positioner doesn't “grind” the way a linearly-stepping head positioner does.

There's a lesson in there somewhere, but I'm not entirely sure what it is...

A New Way to Explore History...

Almost everything I've read of history (that's hundreds of books; history is a passion of mine) is secondhand material.  Historians research the original documents, digest them, apply their own spin, and write a book.  The historians cite and sometimes briefly quote the original source material, but only rarely does someone like me get to see any other than a very short piece of the real thing.

Some very different recently became available, from (of all people) Donald Rumsfeld.  As a companion site to his memoir, he's put up a web site that includes digitized and searchable texts of thousands of original documents related to his life and experience.  Given his career, this means that it's full of fascinating documents.  So far I've just dabbled in it, searching on a few keywords (like “Kandahar”) and just browsing through the results.  The whole experience, though, is entirely new to me – it's as though someone let me into Rumsfeld's private filing system.  What to look for?  I have to learn how to use this tool to satisfy my own thirst for historical knowledge.  It has the feel of something revolutionary and … really, really cool.

If you share my interest in history, you'll want to check this out.

Quote of the Day...

Mark Steyn, reacting to Lindsay Graham's blaming of the Koran-burning pastor for the deaths in Afghanistan:

A mob of deranged ululating blood-lusting head-hackers slaughter Norwegian female aid-workers and Nepalese guards — and we’re the ones with the problem?

Well said. The whole post is well worth reading.

We are reaping the inevitable rewards of multi-culti and other emasculating progressive political initiatives...

Reunited...

It's in Japanese, but really, no words are required...

MESSENGER: Science Mission Begins!

MESSENGER's main science mission has begun.  All systems are now fully up and running, and all systems are operating flawlessly.  Six and half years after launch, everything is still A-OK.  Woo hoo!

The most accessible science data for most people are the photographs, and they're starting to pour in.  Visit the gallery on the MESSENGER site for the latest...

The Psychiatrist & The Proctologist

Via my mom:

The Psychiatrist & The Proctologist

Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and decided that, in spite of two different specialties, they would open a practice together to share office space and personnel.

Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist; they put up a sign reading: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors". The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

So, the docs changed it to read: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids". This was also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign.

"Catatonics and High Colonics" No go.

Next, they tried "Manic Depressives and Anal Retentives" thumbs down again.

Then came "Minds and Behinds" - still no good.

Another attempt resulted in "Lost Souls and Butt Holes" - unacceptable again!

So they tried "Analysis and Anal Cysts" - not a chance. "Nuts and Butts" - no way.

So "Freaks and Cheeks" - still no good.

"Loons and Moons" - forget it.

Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with: "Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Odds and Ends"

Everyone loved it.

Eriastrum densifolium subsp. sanctorum

From Botany Photo of the Day, of course!

Modern Aircraft Identification...

For some reason this official aircraft silhouette identification chart has upset the UFO believers.  Can't imagine why!

Rescued Dog and Its Owner Reunited...

Saturday I wrote about the dog rescued off the coast of Japan, quite possibly the last survivor of the earthquake and tsunami of three weeks ago.  This morning comes the news that the dog and its owner have been reunited.  I couldn't find pictures or video, but who cares?  What a nice way to start the morning...

Yee Haw!

I'd pay good money for the opportunity to do this.  I think just once, though...

NGC 6872...

This image was captured by a girl's high school astronomy club in Sydney, Australia.  Via APOD, of course.

Japan's Last Quake Survivor?

Three weeks on flotsam, with no food or water – then rescued by men who had given up all hope of finding any survivors.

That's one happy dog (click to enlarge).  I sure hope his owner has survived and can be found.  If not, somehow I'm certain this little fellow will find a loving home.

This story (and these videos) sure put a smile on my face this morning...

Get Your Exercise – While Emailing!

From Google, via reader Simon M.  Looks ... tiring!

Watch the video, and don't forget to click on the "Try Gmail Motion" button...

Moving a Barn...

Via my mom:




Wow!

A Different Take...

...on Professor Muller, whom I wrote about a few days ago.

Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade...

This site is interesting on several levels: as a demonstration of accessible data mining, as a tool for quantative history study, and as a means for anybody to informally learn a lot more fact-based history (a commodity in amazingly short supply!).

The screenshot at right (click to enlarge) shows one of my own explorations: I wanted to know where slaves actually went.  Answer: the vast majority went to the Caribbean and to South America – not North America.  Prior to seeing these numerical data, I'd known that many slaves went to the Caribbean – but I did not know that such an overwhelming majority went there, nor did I know that so many went to South America.

There is much else to learn at that site...