Unarius Videos...

If you've read this blog for a while, you may remember the Unarians – a bizarre cult headquartered in El Cajon, and owning property near our home in Lawson Valley. We “discovered” them shortly after moving to Lawson Valley in 1999, when we sighted a car belonging to the cult. It's unmistakable: a large American sedan with a model flying saucer on top and a crazy lady inside.

Click here if you want to learn more about these fruit loops.

What prompted this post was my discovery of this blog post with lots of Unarius videos (one example is below). This blogger is as amused and incredulous about the Unarians as I am. Watch the Unarian videos with this understanding: there are real people, walking amongst us unrestrained, who study these videos (and other materials distributed by the Unarians). They believe the messages in them.

I don't know about you, but to me, that's scary!

Iraq Movies...

Several movies about Iraq have recently been released: Lions for Lambs, Redacted, and The War. All of them have a distinctly anti-war message. All of them have been flops at the box office.

Meanwhile, modern technology has let troops in combat take their own movies and photos, and post them on the Internet for all to see. Some of this footage has been professionally edited and produced, but much is raw amateur stuff. Some of these have become amongst the most popular video clips on YouTube – the number of views of most of these is hundreds or thousands of times higher than the viewings of the aforementioned Hollywood movies. Some examples (with links to others) here, here, here, and below.

Isn't it interesting that those movies with the anti-war message – all major Hollywood productions, with major stars, heavy marketing, and big-name directors and producers – are all losers in the market? And that the nitty-gritty, real-life combat videos are a smash hit?

What got me going on this topic was reading a note about how the Democratic campaigns are hearing – to their apparent surprise – that American voters are not the anti-war crowd that they assumed. And the campaigns are adjusting their messaging and tactics.

Interesting. I'm just saying.

Puzzler...

Last week's puzzler was this: what caused the “erratic boulders” that are found all over the country of Estonia? Most of you (13 of 17) got it right: the erratic boulders were left by the retreating glaciers. The boulders were originally scraped from the pink granite bedrock exposed in northern and southern Finland, and then carried hundreds of miles south to Estonia. As the glaciers melted, the boulders gradually descended until finally they were left on the bare limestone ground of Estonia. The Vikings carved runes into some of these boulders, and examples of such carved boulders can be seen in many locations in Estonia. In addition, the local cultures paid attention to many of them (especially the larger ones), and many of the boulders have footpaths to them, and ladders to climb them, and these are maintained to this day. A popular roadmap made by an Estonia company has the location of hundreds of these boulders marked, and in my travels around Estonia I have visited dozens of them, just for fun.

This week's puzzler tests your knowledge about the Earth's atmosphere. You most likely know that the atmospheric pressure is highest at sea level (well, actually, at those points on the Earth that are below sea level), and that the pressure falls as you go to higher and higher elevations. But at what altitude does the atmospheric pressure fall to half the pressure at sea level?

No fair Googling until after you answer!

My Grandfather's Son...

I just finished reading this fine memoir by Clarence Thomas (Supreme Court Justice). It was not at all what I was expecting. I knew nothing whatsoever about Clarence Thomas' life other than his years at the helm of the EEOC, the Anita Hill “scandal”, and what I've read of his decisions and opinions on the Supreme Court. So I was expecting surprises, but the book delivered many more than I'd imagined…

The picture of Clarence Thomas that emerges is that of an ordinary human, with all the imperfections and failures that any of us might have. But for all his failings, I also have the impression of a good man, in the old-fashioned sense of that term. I've read quite a few of his legal opinions at this point, and they uniformly impress me with their logic, analysis, and unpretentious style – even when I don't agree with them. After reading his memoir, they seem to me to be evidence of a real victory for civil rights in America – that such a talent might rise to an office like Justice of the Supreme Court, despite having grown up in a nation full of official and enforced prejudice against him simply for being black.

I remember well the confirmation hearings and the Anita Hill debacle. At the time, without being able to hear Clarence Thomas' case in any detail, it just seemed an awful mess to me – I had no idea who was telling the truth, or who to believe. If all of Anita Hill's allegations were true, then Clarence Thomas certainly shouldn't have been confirmed; on the other hand, if the allegations were false (or largely so), then the whole affair made a travesty of the confirmation hearings and Clarence Thomas was being terribly wronged. Having read his memoir now, I've got his side of the – and his version seems to be amply confirmed by independent witnesses. I'm persuaded now that the entire Anita Hill “scandal” was manufactured by Ms. Hill and her Democratic enablers who were so eager for a reason to thwart President Bush's effort to appoint Clarence Thomas. In other words, it was just one more pathetic political charade, fully in character with the disgusting (and equally pathetic) posturings we're already seeing in both the Democratic and the Republican presidential primary races…

Quote of the Day...

From TigerHawk:

Call me an irony junkie, but I find it hilarious that the pope of the Roman Catholic Church is worried that the "dogma" of the environmental movement is more influential than scientific proof. Not saying I don't agree with him, just that I am highly entertained.

Here's the article about the pope's skepticism.
I share TigerHawk's amusement...

Even More Rain!

This past Friday through Sunday we had a second rain storm, adding about 1.35 inches to our rainfall for the year. Yahoo!

This morning, to the apparent surprise of the weather forecasters, we had some light drizzle – enough to wet the roads, but not enough to accumulate appreciably.

And the weather forecast is calling for another storm to hit on Monday. It's beginning to feel a bit l like our seven-year drought has broken. That would sure be wonderful...

Relativistic Support...

My mother-in-law is a sweet and wonderful person, and I love her dearly. She's also a nearly perfect anti-geek, a technophobe at a level most people would think was surely extinct in, say, 1950. They would be wrong, as they haven't met Kate. She is intimidated by toasters, and I am neither exaggerating nor embellishing.

Kate lives in an old farmhouse outside of Liberty, Indiana – as close to the middle of nowhere as you can get without living in South Dakota. Until earlier this year, she'd made do with rabbit-ear antennae for her televisions. She could just barely pick up signals from Cinncinnati, Ohio or Indianapolis, Indiana – the only television she knew was intermittent and filled with static. So we got her a satellite system as a gift earlier this year. For weeks, Debbie and I spent hours with her on the phone, usually with her crying in frustration – but finally we were able to get her to the point where she could actually use her new system. And now she loves it! There was much pain getting her started, but now we're quite happy we got her this gift, as she clearly is enjoying it.

The number one problem she's had with the system is something most people are very used to. The remote control is “modey” – at any given moment, it's either in “satellite” mode or in “TV” mode. She just can't get this concept into her head, so she's forever trying to do something that requires the remote control to be in a different mode. We got Kate past this roadblock by teaching her some rote instructions, namely to alway press the satellite mode button before she did anything, and to never, ever press the TV mode button. Once she pressed the TV mode button, then she was sure to change the TV channel – and then she'd lose the satellite signal. The next step after that would be to call us, crying. But, as I say, we'd gotten past that.

But last night Kate called us with a new problem. She wasn't upset – the system had been working well for months, and she'd gotten much more comfortable with it. But it wasn't working last night, and she said it stopped working when she accidentally sat on the remote control. Thinking that she had somehow managed to put the remote in TV mode and changed the channel, I talked her through putting the channel back to rights. At one point, I told her “Now press 6, and then 0.”. A few seconds later, I got two touch-tone beeps in my ear, and then Kate came back on and told me that nothing had happened on the TV. Much laughter ensued, which confused Kate until I explained it to her – and when I did, the rest of the people in the room on my end got the joke as well, and there was even more laughter. Kate was quite embarrassed, but finally she laughed at herself as well...

The problem turned out to be more involved than usual. Somehow in sitting on the remote control she had changed it's programming – it no longer knew what brand her TV was, and consequently it was putting out the wrong infrared remote control codes (that is a totally non-standard world). Talking her through entering the proper codes was one of the more difficult support tasks I've ever undertaken, but we finally did get it done, and the TV worked fine after that.

Kate would never forgive me for putting this on the Internet for all to see, but, then, she has no idea that the Internet exists, so I'm safe...

Human Tetris

Offered as evidence to support the assertion that there is no bound to human silliness:

Timeless Political Humor

Simi L. sent these along. Many of these I had heard before, but not all. They're all great – both funny and wise…

If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
– Mark Twain

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself...
– Mark Twain

I contend that for a Nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
– Winston Churchill

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
– George Bernard Shaw

Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
– James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)

Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
– Douglas Casey

Government is the great fiction through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else.
– Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
– Will Rogers

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free!
– P.J. O'Rourke

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.
– Voltaire (1764)

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!
– Pericles (430 B.C.)

No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
– Mark Twain (1866)

Talk is cheap...except when Congress does it.
– Unknown (but widely attributed to Mark Twain)

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
– Winston Churchill

The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
– Mark Twain

The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.
– Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)

There is no distinctly native American criminal class … save Congress.
– Mark Twain

What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.
– Edward Langley, Artist (1928 - 1995)

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.
– Thomas Jefferson

Jamulian Eateries...

By request (of Bob Clay), here are our favorite places to eat in or near Jamul (using Jamul to mean the entire unincorporated area, not just the town). I've listed these starting with the places we frequent the most often, which is probably as good a measure of "favorite" as anything...

Bravo Cafe: we count a stop at Manoli's place as one of our favorite things to do, even without considering the food. The people there are just wonderful folks. These days you'll most often find Manoli with his daughter Esmeralda and his son Milton helping out, along with a couple of employees who fit right into the family's style: friendly, helpful, and just plain nice to be around. And then there's the food: Manoli's superb soups (the chicken rice and meatball soups are my favorites), the sandwiches (huge piles of good stuff on plain-but-good breads), and the salads (simple but fresh, crisp, and plentiful).

Descanso Junction Restaurant: good food, good people, and a home-style atmosphere. Some of their soups are really quite good (the tomato Florentine and chicken and big fat noodle soups are my favorites), the burgers are great, and they have many other delectables to choose from. Yesterday I had an excellent omlet (the “gourmet”) that was classic American fare: a simple plain-egg omlette filled with bacon, sausage, green peppers, onions, and cheese. They are often overwhelmed by motorcycle clubs (of the harmless middle-aged fake biker variety) around lunch on weekends, so watch your timing on visits there.

Yuki Sushi: reliably good sushi at reasonable prices, and very friendly people. Even at reasonable prices, sushi is expensive, so we don't get there as often as we'd really like to. Since Tatsu's closed several years ago, this is our sushi haunt. We've tried the other local places, but don't like them nearly as well.

Behind-the-7/11 Mexican: sorry, but I don't know the name of this place. It's behind the 7/11 at Steele Canyon and 94, in the back of a small Mexican grocery. We go in there to get fresh giant flour tortillas, and often come out with burritos as well. The people there have always been very friendly with us, though we have the occasional language difficulty (some of them speak very little English, and we speak absolutely no Spanish). When I get a craving for carnitas, or some chicken enchiladas, or a carne asada burrito, this is where I go...

A Mellow Couple of Days...

Blogging has been light because I've been having a (tiny) little bit of a life this weekend. My lovely bride and I toured the snow in our local mountains, bought a Christmas tree, decorated it, and had a couple of very pleasant meals in places we love.

To the anonymous jerk who wrote me, complaining about my lack of blogging: get a life!

U.S. Healthcare

I found a fascinating article about the future of U.S. health care that resonates strongly with me. A sample:

Politicians from across the political spectrum, including Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton and Republican candidate Mitt Romney, have argued that the government should guarantee “universal coverage” to all Americans, making health care a “right.” And politicians are not alone; numerous businessmen, union leaders, and insurance executives are united in saying that this will solve our problems.

It will not.

Contrary to claims that government-imposed “universal health care” would solve America’s health care problems, it would in fact destroy American medicine and countless lives along with it. The goal of “universal health care” (a euphemism for socialized medicine) is both immoral and impractical; it violates the rights of businessmen, doctors, and patients to act on their own judgment—which, in turn, throttles their ability to produce, administer, or purchase the goods and services in question. To show this, we will first examine the nature and history of government involvement in health insurance and medicine. Then we will consider attempts in other countries and various U.S. states to solve these problems through further government programs. Finally, we will show that the only viable long-term solution to the problems in question is to convert to a fully free market in health care and health insurance.

Now go read the whole thing!

The Day That Lives In Infamy...

On this day in 1941, the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor, on Oahu, Hawaii. President Franklin Delano Roosevelt, in his speech urging Congress to declare war on Japan, famously called this date “...a date which will live in infamy.”

Sixty-six years later, the world still remembers that attack. If you're old enough to have lived through Pearl Harbor, I'm sure you don't need any prodding to remember the Americans who were killed and injured by the Japanese. If you're younger, as am I, then take a few moments today to remember – and to ponder the relevance to our world today…

Updated to add link to this article.

Things Change, Part 35212345...

I caught this little snippet from an article in the Union-Tribune:

Fire isn't the only problem facing San Diego County's choose-and-cut tradition.

Farmers are getting older. Most members of the state's Christmas tree association are over 50, Minturn said. The latest victim of age is the 20-acre Van Winkle's Tree Farm in Jamul. For the first time since the mid-1970s, Van Winkle's won't be selling Christmas trees, said Grace Van Winkle, 79. Van Winkle said her sons are taking over the farm from her and her husband, Alfred, 81, and the younger generation decided to focus on the year-round business of nursery plants.

“Our sons didn't have time,” she said.

Every time we leave or return to our home in Lawson Valley, we pass the Van Winkle farm. Ever year until this year, there's been a cheerful little sign along Lawson Valley Road, directing Christmas tree seekers through the side roads to Van Winkle's farm, where they could choose and cut their own tree. We did that many times, starting from before we moved out here.

No more. This year there's a simple, hand-painted sign telling us that the Van Winkle farm no longer has any Christmas trees. They must have been tired of their returning customers showing up, expecting to buy their tree this year. The Van Winkles also used to run a delightful little crafts store full of Christmas decorations; I suppose that's gone as well.

I can certainly understand the reasons that the sons have decided not to continue the Christmas tree farm. If it doesn't make business sense to continue it, then of course they should not. I don't have to like it, though…

Puzzler

The correct answer to last week's puzzler was “Gunter's Rule”. You can see one from my collection here.

For this week's question, we turn to natural history. Nearly the entire country of Estonia has a similar geological makeup: a thick layer of limestone covered by a thin layer of soil (which is chock full of limestone rocks). However, almost anywhere in Estonia you can find rocks (some as large as a house) made of a pinkish granite. These rocks are called “erratic boulders” by geologists, and they are more common in Estonia than anywhere else in the world. How did the erratic boulders get there?

As always, no fair googling…

There and Back Again...

Several of you actually noticed that I haven't posted for a few days – the reason was an evil illness (most likely some sort of food poisoning) that invaded my body on Sunday afternoon and didn't really leave until Tuesday. Yesterday I was feeling pretty puny, but at least not sick. Today I feel fine. It's always great when you're done being sick!

We've got an amazing amount of weather news at the moment. As I write, I'm watching high surf outside my office window – repeated sets of big, rolling breakers crashing into the beach. There's a gaggle of onlookers already (it's only 8 am here), marveling at the power, demonstrated. The forecast is calling for rain, and lots of it, starting late tonight and extending into Saturday. This comes on top of more than two inches just a week ago; from rags to riches, as it were. All sorts of related phenomena are predicted as well: lightning, waterspouts (aka tornadoes over water), flash floods, flooded lowlands, mudslides, rock slides, and caustic slides from the alkaline runoff coming from the recently burned areas. Even snow up in the mountains, above about 5,000 feet! Tomorrow it may be entirely possible to do some exciting body surfing in the morning (in the big surf) and then have a snowball fight in the afternoon (by driving 50 miles or so into the mountains).

I heard a discussion on the radio this morning between some forecasters who were speculating that the oncoming storm could drop as much as four or five inches of rain on us. If that actually happens, we'll have gone from parched conditions five weeks ago to sopping wet by this weekend. Quite a turnaround, and I'm sure hoping we see it…

Award Banquet...

Yesterday afternoon, Debbie and I drove up to Long Beach, California for the AKC Eukanuba Agility National show. Debbie could have run Mo'i this year, but chose not to – but there's no way she was going to miss the awards banquet, as this is where they handed out the certificates for the top agility dog in each breed. Last year, Mo'i was the top field spaniel in agility.

The banquet was casual attire, and indeed there were people there in everything from grubby blue jeans to something close to formal evening wear. Debbie wore her “Jamulian formal dress” – cowboy boots, a big bejeweled belt buckle, jeans, a fancy embroidered blouse, and a leather jacket. Earlier in the day she had her hair spectacularly curled. She looked great!

First there was an hour of cocktails, standing up in the lobby of the big meeting room. The noise was nearly beyond bearing; I could hardly hear someone yelling right into my ear. Most of the people in the room had run their dogs that day at the show, and there was much excited conversation; people happy with their runs, and people not so happy. Everyone in the room was an accomplished agility handler (or their signficant other) – a room full of very talented people, as became abundantly clear during the banquet.

After the cocktail hour, we all moved into the meeting room and sat down for our meal. The food was not memorable (is it ever at one of these?), but the rest of the experience certainly was.

First they showed a series of photos from the days run, apparently favorites of the photographer. As various dogs appeared, cheers erupted from different parts of the room. This was a lot of fun – we all got to see the top agility dogs in action, with the photos taken by one of the best photographers in the field. It was also a great ice-breaker; people were talking and comparing notes.

After this, our dinner was served, and the awards began. The announcer was up on a little stage, and she read off the champion dog in each breed, in alphabetical order by breed. For each champion dog, she showed a photo or two, read off some of the accomplishments of the dog, and called the handler or owner up onto the stage to receive their certificate. It was all very nicely done.

Each person walking up to the stage was treated with applause, cheers, and lots of congratulations along the way. When the alphabetical reading got to “field spaniel”, it was Debbie's turn. The photo above shows her walking off the stage just after having received her certificate. What fun!

My scanner is misbehaving at the moment, so I can't show you the actual certificate – but here's what it says:

The American Kennel Club
Special Award of Merit

Awarded December 1, 2007 for
Outstanding Performance in Agility

Top Field Spaniel 2006

Wolftree's Pearl King AX MXJ NF

owned by
Tom Dilatush, Debbie Dilatush

Madness...

Most likely you've read (or seen) the news story about British teacher Gillian Gibbons who was convicted in Sudan of “insulting religion and inciting hatred”. Thousands of Sudanese are protesting (see photo at right), demanding that she be executed instead of the sentence she actually received: 15 days in jail and deportation. The more moderate demonstrators are calling for 200 lashes in a public flogging, a sentence that almost invariably kills the convict. The blogosphere has nicknamed this the “teddy bear jihad”.

Ms. Gibbon's actual crime? She allowed her class to choose the name “Mohammed” for a teddy bear. Seriously – that's the only actual accusation made about her behavior.

Tigerhawk has my favorite observation about this madness:

As I've written before, I've grown quite tired of "Muslim rage." Piling into the street in anger over something like this is purely and simply barbaric, and Westerners who treat it as anything other than that do not appreciate the importance of reason to their own spiritual, cultural, intellectual, and economic heritage. We should either mix some Prozac into the relief agency rice or get out of that part of the world as quickly as possible.

Prozac is definitely needed, and in very large quantities. Given this set of facts, my father would quickly weave an elaborate story about fleets of surplus bombers delivering endless loads of Prozac, strewing the drug in powdered form anywhere Isamic madness showed up. That would be a lot of Prozac!

Botanical Beauty...

Another beautiful botanical photo from Botany Photo of the Day. This time it's Eryngium creticum (whatever that is!).

Rain: 2.35 Inches!

The graph at right tells the story: 1.05 inches on Friday, and 1.3 inches on Saturday, for a storm total of 2.35 inches. The time scale on the graph at right is GMT, so in local time most of the rain actually occured on Friday.

But who cares? The big news is that we had rain, so so much of it! The forecast as of Friday morning was for 1/2 inch to 1 inch in the mountains, and less toward the shore – so we were expecting perhaps 1/2 inch. And we'd have been very happy to get it. But 2.35 inches is like an over-the-top Christmas present. The chaparral is very thirsty after 7 years of drought here. But best of all is that most likely this rain ends any serious fire danger in our area until next summer. I say this because in all likelihood we will begin our rainy season before the chaparral dries out from this rain – and then we won't get real dry until next summer's heat–

Rain!!!

We're getting rain! Wet stuff, falling out of the sky…

My rain gauge is registering about a tenth inch (2 mm) so far, and the real rain is forecast to hit us this evening.

The image at right is the current NEXRAD weather radar image, with storm cell tracking. All those storm cells, preceding the main storm – such a lovely sight they are!

I can scarcely believe it, this early in our rainy season, but – the NOAA forecasters are predicting as much as one inch (25 mm) of rain between now and tomorrow evening. Oh, how nice that would be!

Bill Is Going DOWN!

On the way to work this morning, I had an interesting and quite satisfying experience. I was driving north on I-5, just north of the I-805 merge, through moderately heavy traffic moving along at 65 to 70 MPH. In my rearview mirror I spotted a red pickup weaving in and out of traffic – no turn signals, jerky and largely unpredictable lane changes, and just generally looking extremely unsafe. As the pickup approached, I could see that the driver was a young man, perhaps 20 years old. He zoomed up in the lane to the left of me, abruptly changed lanes into my lane just in front of me, at which point I was staring at his tailgate just a couple of feet from my front bumper (and of course I braked hard at that point, just to get some space from this nutcase).

A couple of minutes later he was something like a half-mile ahead of me, still weaving and bobbing through the traffic – and a police officer nailed him, pulling him over to the left shoulder. As I approached the scene, I was pondering whether I should stop and offer a witness statement. Finally I decided that I should. Several other people had already stopped, and a few more stopped after me – perhaps 10 people in all.

The cop had arrested the driver, and had him in handcuffs in the back of the police car. The window was open, and the driver was fuming mad, saying all sorts of stupid things, such as some kind of incoherent threat about how he was going to get the cop for causing him to lose his job. What a moron!

But the cop was standing there calmly with a great, big shit-eating grin on his face, copying down contact information and brief statements from the line of people who had, like me, stopped. When it was my turn, and I had finished, I asked the cop what he thought would happen to the driver. He said (in my quote for the day):

Bill is going down!

“Bill” is the name of the driver he arrested, and it turns out that this was Bill's fifth reckless driving offense. But this time, according to the cop, was the first time that there were credible witnesses who were willing, if necessary, to give testimony. I'm not sure why that was, though I can say that Bill was driving in a particularly threatening and obnoxious manner, and that may have motivated people to stop. I have stopped before for such incidents, but I have also passed many by; something about this guy's behavior made me take the time to stop. I'm glad we all did – that will be one less lunatic on the freeway trying to kill me…

Big Kites...

Kites pulling cargo ships. Really!

Leapin' Lizards!

Well, leaping cats, actually. Here's a great photo collection of cats caught in mid-leap.

The Four Cats...

Sent to me by my mom, who knows my taste in humor:

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.

The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist and the fourth man was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called his cat. “T-square, do your stuff!” T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said “Spreadsheet, do your stuff!” Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies. Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do even better. He called his cat and said “Measure, do your stuff!” Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass. Everyone agreed that was pretty darned good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said “What can your cat do?” The Government Employee called his cat and said “Coffee Break, do your stuff!” Coffee Break jumped to his feet and...
...ate the cookies,
...drank the milk,
...shit on the paper,
...screwed the other three cats,
...claimed he injured his back while doing so,
...filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions,
...put in for Worker's Compensation,
...and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave!

The first thing I thought after reading this was “John Murtha”…

Puzzler...

Well, the last puzzler apparently wasn't all that puzzling: everybody who answered was at least close. If you're interested in the story of the cargo ship SS Mayaguez, you can read about it here.

Meanwhile, here's a new puzzler:

As long ago as the late 1600s, Europeans were using a straight piece of material (usually wood, sometimes ivory or brass) much like a ruler with special markings to make all sorts of calculations, including multiplication, division, trigonometry, and logarithms. This device was normally used in conjunction with a pair of dividers (a compass with two metal points). It was as ubiquitous amongst the engineers and scientists of the day as computers and calculators are today – but today it is virtually unknown and unheard of. What was this device called?

Quote of the Day

Simon M. sent me a link to this article. The comments to it contain my quote of the day, by someone going by the handle “Billy Bob Henry”:

Anyone that thinks global warming is flase needs a lobotomy..

Ignoring the misspelling and the amputated ellipsis for the moment, the commenter encapsulates quite nicely the philosophy – and the “science” – of the true believers of the anthropomorphic global warming faith. We're supposed to blindly believe their high priests (Gore and Hansen) and the climate models. At the same time, we're supposed to dismiss all the actual evidence that questions the assumptions and conclusions that go into those models. Oh, and we're supposed to throw away common sense as well – so that when someone points out that (for example) the polar bear population is actually higher now than ever before in recorded history, so using their declining population as evidence of the impact of global warming is, well, bogus – we're supposed to dismiss that as the ravings of some sort of lunatic fringe.

Otherwise, we need a lobotomy.

I think it's more like this: those who blindly keep faith with anthropomorphic global warming while ridiculing its critics are anti-scientists who are acting like they've already had a lobotomy. I say “anti-scientists” because the very essence of science includes skepticism and debate (along with evidence and verifiable tests or predictions). Listen to Jim Hansen and his crowd, and you see precious little of anything I can recognize as science – and a whole lot of self-serving fear mongering that I believe is carefully calculated to increase their funding…

More Feasting...

Debbie and I went a little crazy with the cooking this year. For four successive days we've feasted on some luscious dishes...

We had about a pound of lobster meat left over after our Thanksgiving Day meal, so on Friday I made lobster rolls. For those of you who may be (sadly) unfamiliar with lobster rolls, this is a traditional American dish from the northeast (especially Maine). Many people believe this is the very best way to enjoy lobster. There are almost as many recipes for lobster rolls as there are people who make them; about the only things I can see in common between them are these: (1) it's all about the lobster; other ingredients are kept to a minimum, and (2) they need to be on toasted rolls.

Being on the West Coast, we can't just go down to our grocery and buy lobster rolls in the bakery section of the grocery store. Hot dog buns are just not good enough. So we made a “San Diego substitution”: we used Dudley's potato bread, grilled in butter to toast them. The filling I made by roughly chopping the lobster meat into about 1/2” pieces, then adding some finely chopped celery and chives (not much of each), a little mayonnaise, and some chopped tarragon. I wanted to use fresh tarragon, but we were out – so I rehydrated some dried tarragon in a little lukewarm water, and it did quite nicely (you have to have the dried tarragon that's in little pieces, not the powdered type, for this to work). That's it! We just mixed those ingredients, piled it high between a couple slides of grilled potato bread, and feasted. My oh my, that was good!

On Saturday we roasted a small turkey. Debbie made a fine white gravy with the giblets and drippings, and we had open-faced roast turkey sandwiches, on toasted potato bread, with gravy. Yum! And then on Sunday I made broth from the leftover turkey bones, and Debbie turned it into tlapeno (a traditional Mexican soup) made with turkey instead of chicken. She's made this dish quite a few times, and this was her best yet – a simple, clear-broth soup redolent of turkey, full of tasty ingredients with a great texture. Naturally, being Debbie, she made vast quantities of the stuff – we could have fed a significant number of Marines with it! But it was just the two of us, so now there's a wonderful, giant-sized container in the refrigerator chock full of this delectable stuff.

I suspect we're both going to take a few days off from cooking…

Thanksgiving...

America's Thanksgiving Day has a long history, back to the earliest days of this country. While many Presidents (including George Washington) promoted and endorsed the holiday with proclamations, it was President Abraham Lincoln who started the current unbroken string of proclamations by every President who succeeded him. His proclamation was made on October 3, 1863:

I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to His tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquillity and Union.

Debbie and I have much to be thankful for this year.

First and foremost on our minds is the fact that we and our home survived the horrible fires of three weeks ago, completely unharmed.

Our beloved animals – eight cats and three dogs – are all healthy and happy.

Our health is excellent, aside from the unavoidable side effects of our advancing age.

I make a good living in a job that I greatly enjoy. We've never known hunger, poverty, or lacked for anything truly important.

We live in the greatest country on earth – despite it's abundant flaws, there's nowhere I'd rather live. Not one of the hundred or so countries I've visited has ever even tempted me.

And we are very thankful on this day for the soldiers and sailors who are in harm's way on this day of thanksgiving, voluntarily engaging this country's enemies in mortal combat. Those fine, brave men and women seem to percieve the existential threat posed to our country by Islamic fundamentalists with far greater clarity than many Americans who are safe and snug in their homes today. Every time I meet one of these soldiers or sailors who have served in Iraq or Afghanistan (and that happens fairly often here in San Diego, as we have many military bases here), I try hard to find the time to get to know them a bit. Most of all, I make a it a point to thank them for their service. They stand between my loved ones and Al Queda (and its ilk), and for that they have my eternal gratitude…and they should know it. I hope you'll do the same…

Sated...

Debbie and I just finished our Thanksgiving feast, which was spread out over several hours. It was just the two of us today – a delightful, quiet holiday together.

Being certifiable weirdos, we didn't have a “normal” Thanksgiving meal. No turkey, gravy, dressing, pies, cranberry sauce, or corn for us. Nope, none of that stuff. Instead, we had a seafood feast – and what a feast it was!

As an appetizer, we had fresh Atlantic sea scallops. Debbie has developed this into a fine, and refined, delicacy: broiled briefly, in a shallow pan, with butter, garlic, and dill. They are so good you'll think your brains fell out!

We drank champagne through the whole meal – Moet Chandon White Star. Excellent tipple.

For our main course we had a specialty of mine: Atlantic Lobster a l'Americaine (using a recipe from Julia Child). We started with three 2 lb. female Maine lobsters, shipped live from the wonderful Young's Lobster Pound, in Belfast, Maine (we got the scallops there as well). All three of them had roe, so we had plenty of coral and tomalley to flavor the dish. The sauce is a reduction sauce that starts in a manner that still seems odd to me, though I've made this dish many times: you saute the shells (with some vegetables), and then boil them. The resulting sauce might as well be called “essence of lobster” – saturated with lobster flavor, and emitting an delightfully lobstery perfume. The sauce is finished with a tomalley/coral/butter paste and my favorite spice: fresh tarragon. The cooked lobster meat is sauteed briefly (with some shallots) in butter, then folded into the sauce. We served it over simple boiled rice.

For a vegetable we made a favorite: asparagus tips sauteed in butter. Simply glorious.

Now we're done – we've even cleaned up the impressive mess in the kitchen. We're full; beyond being simply sated, we are uncomfortable. Almost in pain. I'm drinking a cup of tea in the fond hope that it will settle down the battle in my belly.

Dang, that was a good meal!

And we have leftovers… Half the lobster meat is in the refrigerator, destined to become lobster rolls tomorrow. About half the sauce remains as well; don't know what we're going to do with it, but whatever it is, it will be wonderful!

Blogging will now be interrupted as I slip into a cholesterol-induced coma…

Nun in Hooters...

Jim M. passes this along:

A nun, badly needing to use to the restroom, walked into a local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off.

Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom?"

The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf."

"Well, in that case I'll just look the other way," said the nun.

So, the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant. After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause. She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?"

"Well, now they know you're one of us," said the bartender, "Would you like a drink?"

"But, I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun.

"You see," laughed the bartender, "every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out. Now, how about that drink?"

I've never been in a Hooter's, so I don't know if they really have such a statue. But I hope so!

Joy of Aging...

Our friend Dick F., who (however improbably) is even older than we are, passes along these:

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: "Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"

Slim says, "I feel just like a newborn baby."

"Really!? Like a newborn baby!?"

"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."

The other man said, "What's the name of the restaurant?"

The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know...the one that's red and has thorns."

"Do you mean a rose?"

"Yes, that's the one," replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.

Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. "Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?" he asks.

"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

"Sure."

"Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" she asks.

"No, I can remember it."

"Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so's not to forget it?"

He says, "I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."

"I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?" she asks.

Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!"

Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment.

"Where's my toast ?"

A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect."

"Really," answered the neighbor . "What kind is it?"

"Twelve thirty."

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"

"No," he replied, "Arthritis."

Flower Show...

My mom passed this along. When I was a young lad (in the last century), my family had a nursery, and displayed in the Philadelphia Flower Show each year.

Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a Flower Show was in progress. One leaned over and said to the other, "Life is so darned boring; we never have any fun anymore. For $5.00 I'd take my clothes off and streak through that stupid Flower Show!"

"You're on!" said the other old lady holding up a $5.00 bill. The first little old lady slowly fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely nude, streaked (as fast as an old lady can) through the front door of the Flower Show.

Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside the hall followed by loud applause and shrill whistling. The naked and smiling old lady came through the exit door surrounded by a cheering crowd.

"What happened?" asked her waiting friend.

"I won 1st Prize as Best Dried Arrangement!"

Dung Beetles...

Scott Adams (the Dilbert cartoonist) recently completed a new book derived from his blog. He titled it Stick to Drawing Comics, Monkey-Brain! Continuing the theme, he held a contest on his blog for the best blurbs to put on the book's slip cover. Here's the runner-up:

Like a diligent little dung beetle, Adams slogs through the online jungle searching for fresh nuggets of news to polish into his daily blog entries. Some people say you can’t polish a turd, but after reading this book, I’d say they’re just not rubbing hard enough.

There are some very creative people reading that blog! Go read the whole thing, but make sure you swallow your coffee first…

Top Country-Western Hits...

George K. passes along these top country-western hits, slightly tongue-in-cheek (I think):

How can I miss you when you won't go away.

If the phone doesn't ring, you will know its me.

When you leave me walk out backwards so I'll think your coming back.

If I shot you when I wanted to I'd be out by now.

If you won't leave me alone I'll find someone that will.

I am so miserable without you it's almost like your here.

Take me out to the corn field honey and I'll kiss you between the ears.

Odd Natural Phenomena...

These tree-climbing goats were the least odd of the whole bunch! Check ’em all out here.

Disappearing Forecast...

As I drove home from work last week, the radio news was full of stuff about the severe Santa Ana winds forecast for Tuesday (tomorrow). These winds were supposed to be just as strong as those that fanned the fires three weeks ago, but with 20° lower temperatures.

Last night and this morning, I can not find any hint of Santa Ana winds in anybody's forecast. Either I hallucinated the dire forecasts of last week, or a vast wrong-forecast conspiracy is hushing it up.

But if the net is that there will not be any Santa Ana winds this week, then I really, really don't care how or why the forecasters screwed up. Calm winds would be one more thing to give our thanks for on Thursday...

Steyn on Thanksgiving...

My long-time readers know that Mark Steyn is one of my favorite political observers. Saturday he published a fine piece on Thanksgiving, contending that the rest of the world should give thanks for America's existence. From that column:

But on this Thanksgiving the rest of the world ought to give thanks to American national sovereignty, too. When something terrible and destructive happens – a tsunami hits Indonesia, an earthquake devastates Pakistan – the United States can project itself anywhere on the planet within hours and start saving lives, setting up hospitals and restoring the water supply.

Aside from Britain and France, the Europeans cannot project power in any meaningful way anywhere. When they sign on to an enterprise they claim to believe in – shoring up Afghanistan's fledgling post-Taliban democracy – most of them send token forces under constrained rules of engagement that prevent them doing anything more than manning the photocopier back at the base.

If America were to follow the Europeans and maintain only shriveled attenuated residual military capacity, the world would very quickly be nastier and bloodier, and far more unstable. It's not just Americans and Iraqis and Afghans who owe a debt of thanks to the U.S. soldier but all the Europeans grown plump and prosperous in a globalized economy guaranteed by the most benign hegemon in history.

America, the benign hegemon. With less flowery phrase, I've contended this same thing to some of my European friends – who promptly (and predictably) deny that America is benign. When I ask them for examples of our malignity, they typically come up with hoary old chestnuts without even a grain of truth (such as the notion that Americans invaded Iraq to get their oil). Would that they could all see as clearly as Mark Steyn...

A Wrenching Little Journey...

This morning we took a short trip – just a few miles from home, but into a completely different world: Deerhorn Valley and the Mother Grundy Truck Trail, both devastated by the fires of just three weeks ago. We knew from many conversations and the news reports that many homes were destroyed in those areas, so we knew what we were going to see. Knowing didn't make it any easier.

All of the photos in this post can be expanded by clicking on them.

Everywhere we went, we saw homemade signs thanking the firefighters, and others who helped. This one is made of red plastic cups wedged into chain link fence at Rancho Jamul, along 94; we give it top marks for cleverness. These signs are all messages from the hearts of people very grateful for the many homes saved – but we even saw them in front of several homes that were destroyed. Thanks for trying, they seem to say…

First we went east on 94, then northeast on Honey Springs Road. Along that uphill stretch we saw the home at right – saved, and very grateful. I did not take any photos of destroyed homes, as I have no wish to cause any more pain for those victims, and I can imagine that some would not appreciate such photos being taken or displayed.

The trip was through a variety of situations, from completely normal and unburned to vast swathes of devastation. There are places were all the homes were burned; others where all the homes were saved (despite devastation all around). In a few places we saw most homes saved, but one or two homes burned, right in the middle of otherwise intact communities. In some places the fire burned so hot and furious that only large branches and ashes remain. In other places only the grasses and leaves were burned, and all the trees and shrubs were intact. The fire was arbitrary and capricious. Just about the only pattern we could discern were the many places where the fire fighters held a line around someone's home. I try to imagine what such a battle must be like for the men and women on the fire line, but my imagination fails me…

I saw something on this trip that I do not recall ever seeing before, though perhaps I just missed it: many rocks had a pock-marked appearance. On close inspection, they had shards popped off of them, lying on the ground underneath them. These wounded rocks were very common, and generally of very similar appearance. Although there was some variation in the size and shape of these shards, generally they were 3 or 4 inches in diameter, roughly circular, and around a quarter inch thick in their center, tapering off to sharp edges. The only mechanism for this phenomenon that I can think of is the mechanical stress of hot rock on the outside layer expanding against the cold inner rock. There are several more photos of this phenomenon below.

At one point on Mother Grundy Road we found this normally beautiful vista of Deerhorn Valley. I made this panorama from four individual photos to show what it looks like today.

In Lord of the Rings, there is a horrible character named Smaug – a dragon that wreaks terrible damage on the surrounding country, which was named the Desolation of Smaug on maps. That name seems entirely appropriate for this vista. To help orient you, the center of the photo is roughly due north from where we stood. The near peak in the center is Elena Mountain; the rocky rounded peak on the left is Lyons Peak. Lawson Peak can be seen peaking above the horizon, the rocky peak just the left of Elena Mountain.

In the burned areas, signs of life were not to be found at all – with one glaring exception. I've noted before that yucca plants were remarkable fire survivors, and they showed off that skill again in this fire. I saw numerous yucca plants in my walkabouts; many of them were already sending up green shoots to take advantage of the sunlight. None of them appeared to be dead. I have read descriptions of their adaptations for fire resistance: these adaptations include fire-resistant bases of their leaf spikes, excellent insulating properties in the woven layer of these bases around the core, and water stored in the core, protected by that layer. The leaves all burn off, leaving only the pineapple-shaped core – and that core soon sprouts new leaves. The yuccas will be the first green gems in the moonscapes left behind by the fire…

Other plants that look like they are dead are not really as damaged as they appear. Today we saw only skeletons poking out of a mat of ashes. Many of these chaparral plants, well-adapted for fire, will soon send new shoots from their roots to the surface. We know from experience that the manzanitas, lemonade-berries, and many ceanothus will soon sprout – along with many other plants. Oak trees stripped of all their leaves and twigs by the fire will generate new branches and leaves from nodes that lie deep within their wood, protected from the fire by the thick insulation that wood provided. The seeds of many chaparral plants use fire to trigger their germination. So next spring – especially if we have good rains this winter – we will see the plant life start to rebound. But it's sure hard to imagine that right now…

The rest of the images pretty much speak for themselves…

Huckabee Ad...

Mike Huckabee's new campaign ad:

Amazing Ventriloquist...

Jim M. passed these along – videos of the most amazing ventriloquist I have ever seen or heard of. Once you watch the first video, you'll see links to the others…

A Visit to Cuyamaca...

This past weekend, Debbie and I visited some places we're very familiar with: the west slope of Cuyamaca Mountain (along Boulder Creek Road), Engineer Road (along North Peak), and the Stonewall Mine area in Cuyamaca Rancho State Park. Much of these areas was burned over in the awful Cedar Fire of 2003, over four years ago. It's been tough for us to go back there since then, as the fires destroyed some of our favorite scenery in the area…

The toyon (Heteromeles arbutifolia) at right was one of many we saw along Engineer Road. The toyon is a locally common chaparral plant; we have 100 or so specimens on the 25 or so acres surrounding our home. But here they were growing in a burnt-over forest, one of the first native plants (along with ceanothus) to come back after the fire. This would seem to make them a “fire pioneer” plant. The literature I could find on the web seems a bit contradictory on this point; some said that the seedlings were often seen after a fire, but others said that the plants wouldn't become established (and I'm not sure exactly what they mean by that) until there was a closed canopy overhead. But who cares, really – they were a spot of most unexpected beauty in the monochome tones of the burned areas…

The toyon is one of the two common chaparral plants in our area that stays reliably green, even through the droughts (the other is a sumac, commonly called “lemonade berry”). However, it is often quite hidden from view. In the area around our home, it's often found under live oaks, large manzanitas, or even very large ceanothus. This habit makes it an under-appreciated chaparral plant – I suspect many property owners around here don't even know they exist! Just a short walk from our house there is a particularly fine stand of toyon, under a live oak that's about 30 feet tall. But this stand is put to shame by the specimens we saw along Engineer Road.

We saw something else there that greatly cheered me: some pine seedlings, up to a couple feet tall. This is the very first time since the Cedar Fire that I have spotted conifer seedlings in the burned area, something that I found disheartening – so I was delighted to see these little guys! We saw some later in the park, as well. If I were to guess at density, I'd say it was between 20 and 40 seedlings per acre. That sounds very low to me, but perhaps there will be more in following years…

Once we got to the Stonewall Mine area, we had another pleasant surprise: deer. Again, this was the first time we'd spotted deer up here since the Cedar Fire. Their return means that the big predators (especially the mountain lion) will return as well, or perhaps they're already back. The scene at right, taken from a point close to the mine, is a classic autumn scene in the coastal California mountains. The thick grasses always turn a golden brown then, and the winds waft a distinctive smell, much like hay. We spotted the deer in a meadow just south of the one pictured, perhaps a half mile away…

I've always loved the visual textures of these dried grasses, whether as isolated plants or en masse. I find them especially beautiful when backlit, though it's very challenging to capture that high-contrast image in a photo.

Grasses such as these are, of course, amongst the very first pioneer plants after a fire. I don't know if the plants that come up first are from existing seed that survived the fire, or if new seed somehow makes it in. We saw luxurious grass (along with perennial wildflowers) in many burnt-over areas the first spring after the fire, just four or five months afterwards. The wildflowers don't stay in large numbers, unfortunately, but the grass does – in the many natural meadows, amongst rock outcroppings, and along road cuts. These luxurious grasses seem to need something that's available only at higher altitudes (more rainfall, I suspect), as we cannot grow them near our home. If we irrigated, we'd get bazillions of weeds, so I don't even try that…