- I'm not saying let's go kill all the stupid people. I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out.
- I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People move out of the way much faster now.
- You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. If they are holding a gun, she's probably mad.
- Gone are the days when girls cooked like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.
- You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone you've just met? That's common sense leaving your body.
- I don't like making plans for the day. Because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.
- I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes 1,500 days in a row.
- I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.
- Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers: If you find one, what's your plan?
- Everyone has a right to be stupid. Politicians just abuse the privilege.
Saturday, July 11, 2015
A retired person's perspective...
A retired person's perspective... Via my lovely bride: