A new source of coherent light beams...

A new source of coherent light beams ... 250 times more efficiently than lasers.  The current incarnation only puts out tiny amounts of power, but then so did the first semiconductor lasers.  The first one also emits in the ultraviolet range, something very difficult for LEDs or semiconductor lasers to accomplish.  If this proves to be scalable and manufacturable, it will be a very big thing indeed...

Mayonnaise jar and two beers...

Mayonnaise jar and two beers...  Via my CCPOAA (card-carrying, pissed off, ancient-American) mom:

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 beers .

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.

The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full.

The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed.

Now, said the professor as the laughter subsided, I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff.

If you put the sand into the jar first, he continued, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.

Spend time with your children.

Spend time with your parents.

Visit with grandparents.

Take your special someone out to dinner.

Play another 18.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter.

Set your priorities.

The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented.

The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.'

The beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers with a friend.

Search for a new chief...

Search for a new chief...  Via reader Jim M.:

There once was a powerful Japanese emperor who needed a new chief samurai. So he sent out a declaration throughout the entire known world that he was searching for a chief. A year passed, and only three people applied for the very demanding position: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai.

The emperor asked the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Japanese samurai opened a matchbox, and out popped a bumblebee. Whoosh! went his sword. The bumblebee dropped dead, chopped in half. The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"

The emperor then issued the same challenge to the Chinese samurai, to come in and demonstrate why he should be chosen. The Chinese samurai also opened a matchbox and out buzzed a fly. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh! The fly dropped dead, chopped into four small pieces. The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"

Now the emperor turned to the Jewish samurai, and asked him to demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Jewish Samurai opened a matchbox, and out flew a gnat. His flashing sword went Whoosh! But the gnat was still alive and flying around. The emperor, obviously disappointed, said, "Very ambitious, but why is that gnat not dead?"  The Jewish Samurai just smiled and said, "Circumcision is not meant to kill."

Oliver...

Oliver...  Via my lovely bride...

The strip tease...

The strip tease...  Via my card-carrying, pissed off, ancient-American mom (whom I will see in a couple days!):

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day in Iowa when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere.

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left.  He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, "What the world're ya doing, Billy Bob?"

"Good grief, Cletus, ya scared the bejeebers out of me," says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob.

"But me 'n the wife been havin trouble lately in the bedroom d'partment, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor."

My dad would have liked this one :)

$8 ice cubes...

$8 ice cubes...  Really!

I could watch these ads all day...

I could watch these ads all day...  It's brilliant marketing, but it's also a wonderful feel-good story that will brighten your day.  It works, too – if I have a choice to fly on WestJet, I will...

70 years ago today...

70 years ago today ... the Allies invaded France at Normandy: D-Day.  The more I learn about that day, the more I admire the bravery and appreciate the ingenuity of those soldiers of the Greatest Generation.  There aren't many still alive, but a few are making the journey to Normandy for this year's commemorations...

Here are some things you probably didn't know about D-Day (I only knew a couple of them!).

Dolphins...

Dolphins ... save a young girl trying to commit suicide...

Hardware support for integer overflow trapping...

Hardware support for integer overflow trapping...  Hear, hear!  I've spent way too many hours of my life tracking down this type of bug – and it looks so easy to do away with!

California leads the way...

California leads the way ... in Republican gains?  This is an epic flying-pig moment, and I'd be willing to bet you that Democratic strategists around the country are worried.  Very worried.  In the land where Democrats have complete control, where their policies romp freely over the citizenry's freedoms and pocketbooks, and where regulations are a major component of the very air they breath ... the Democrats lost ground.  That's not supposed to happen, you know.  Them there citizens appear to be getting a mite uppity!

Did low fat diets promote obesity?

Did low fat diets promote obesity?  This book makes that claim, and at least one reviewer finds that it makes a plausible case...

The rollback of my ignorance, however slight, is sufficient to complete my morning...

The rollback of my ignorance, however slight, is sufficient to complete my morning...  Friend and former colleague Doug W. (who actually understands the math that I dabble at the edges of) explains the “magic” p^2 - 1 factoid.  He writes:

You had a blog entry yesterday about the fact that p**2 - 1 is divisible by 24 for any prime p > 3. It's actually very simple to derive the result. Assume that p is an odd number, not divisible by 3 (in the problem as stated, we know that p isn't divisible by 3, since p is prime :-).

Now, p**2 - 1 = (p+1)(p-1). Note that these two factors are consecutive even integers. Thus, exactly one of them must be multiple of 4, so when you multiply the two factors together you get a multiple of 8. That is, we know that p-1 is either of the form 4k or 4k+2, in which case p+1 would be of the form 4k+2 or 4k+4, respectively. So the product is either of the form 4k*(4k+2) or (4k+2)(4k+4), each of which is divisible by 8.

Further, since p is not divisible by 3, and since in any three consecutive integers there is exactly one multiple of 3, then either (p+1) or (p-1) must be divisible by 3. Thus, the overall product is a multiple of 8*3 (i.e., 24).

He's right, it is simple!  Assuming, that is, you're facile enough with math to be able to work it out :)

Yes...

Yes.  Via my lovely bride...

The ultimate commute?

The ultimate commute?  Shift change at a French lighthouse...

A really bad spam mail...

A really bad spam mail...  Got this one last night:

Dear

Today we have transfer the advance payment USD331,000 into your account. Find below the swift copy and please kindly let us know when the shipment will be ready.

NB: Open the attach file with java application.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Regards.
Sales manager
alfouad-trading co.

Attached is a file named “331,000 $ SWIFT.jpg.jar”

Obviously, I did not run that jar file.  For the non-geeks out there, a “jar” file contains a program written in Java that can do just about any damn thing it wants to on your system.  Running a jar file that you got from someone you don't know is a really, really bad idea.  It could ruin your whole day.  Actually, a lot of whole days...

There are enough red flags for anyone reading this (poor English, missing name, unlikely monetary pitch, etc.) that I think it's unlikely they'll fool many people.  At least, I hope that's the case!  On the other hand, I can imagine that there are a lot of people who don't realize that running a jar file can do really bad things...

The engineer's perspective...

The engineer's perspective...  Nailed by Scott Adams:

Hiccups...

Hiccups ... are still a complete mystery.  The philosopher in me says that this is evidence that if there is (or was) a Creator, he (or she) had a sense of humor.  The software engineer in me says: “Bug!”

Trials and tribulations, and some progress...

Trials and tribulations, and some progress...  This morning I took my new lawn and garden sprayer out for it's maiden voyage.  It worked great ... but only for about five minutes.  After that, a bolt I forgot to tighten fell out, the sprayer boom fell off, and a small (but essential) plastic part broke.  Dang it!  I called the manufacturer's customer service line, and inside of 30 seconds they identified the broken part, verified that they had stock, and promised to ship it out later today – for free, under warranty.  Can't beat that with a stick!

Last week I dealt with a very rare shipping problem for an Amazon order – a hand truck I'd ordered a month ago had never arrived.  Amazon said they'd ship me a replacement via one-day shipping.  Great!  Except that when I got the confirmation, it listed my mom's address instead of mine.  Not so great.  I called Amazon again, and they said they'd change the shipping address and I should have it by Monday (yesterday).  It didn't arrive.  So this afternoon I called Amazon again, and they said that Federal Express had reported it as lost.  Somebody doesn't want me to have this hand truck!  Amazon now has the second replacement order placed for me, also via overnight delivery, and I just checked that it's going to the correct address.  I wonder what will happen next?

On the positive side, the painters made more progress today – we now have a number of rooms that are completely finished, and things are looking very nice indeed.  Also today the new railing and handrail for our basement entrance-way arrived.  These were designed and fabricated by a local metal worker, and they are far better made than the bent and broken original.  The hand railing needs some minor modification, so it went back to the shop.  The rail, however is now completely installed.  I watched the process, which was far more interesting than I expected it to be.  Instead of the crappy fasteners and worse glue that held the old rail in (which the installers just yanked out!), the new one is anchored in super-strength concrete.  To do this, the installers drilled 3" diameter holes 4" down into the concrete (see photos below), then inserted the new railing and poured the super-strength concrete to make solid footings.  This new rail isn't going anywhere!

The old railing - note the bend in it!

The "core" drill bit...

That's a serious drill!  Note the water cooling...

The drill in action...

The "core" removed by cracking after drilling...

The new railing after installation...

The super-strength concrete footing...

I bask in my own ignorance...

I bask in my own ignorance...  Just ran across a bizarre but easy-to-understand mathematical factoid, which led me to this post that I don't understand at all.

Here's the bizarre factoid: take any prime number other than 2 or 3.  Square it, then subtract one.  The result will be an even multiple of 24.  For example, 1,373 is a prime number; 1,373^2 - 1 = 1,885,128 – which, divided by 24 is 78,547.  I have no idea why this should be so, and it seems mighty odd to me that it is.  What the heck is so special about the number 24?

One slight addendum: the starting number doesn't actually have to be prime, it just has to be relatively prime to 24 (which is another way of saying that it can't be divisible by either 2 or 3).  For example, 25 is not a prime number, but 25^2 - 1 = 24 * 26...